July is nearly over and my month of youth tripping is coming to a close. I spent the past week in the Quad cities (a place I love and fall more in love with each time I visit…) with junior high students…experiencing change that only God can do…learning to love in ways we didn’t think we could…and discovering that we are loved by Jesus.
It was a good week for me…and until tonight I didn’t realize how much God had cracked open my heart. I spent a week seeking God each day for the courage and strength to simply live as a servant…to not be self seeking…to speak kind things…to walk the walk everywhere I went–showers, light’s out, holding a paintbrush…He answered. I grew in my understanding of serving, of loving, of being loved. When I arrived home I had a bit of withdrawal–all of my friends were busy and I had little time to share all that was on my heart and I ached for the community that had been created on this trip. I had one of those teared up, singing at the top of my cracky cold-given “i could have been a smoker” voice, pouring out my heart to Jesus moments in the car…quite possibly scaring the people driving next to me…but all the while being amazed at the God who walks with me when I feel alone, the God who gives passions and compassion, the God who never gives up on our hardened hearts and who cracks us open just in time for us to experience something amazing…like holding a beautiful baby in a park, watching a youth lead who once would hardly talk, getting to talk about boys in a car with no inhibitions and being able to be completely honest with each other…God is good. goodnight all.