Life in this moment…

{entertaining, odd, and hopefully not too far away from reality}

pursued… October 26, 2008

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 10:33 pm

i just finished re-reading Sex God by rob bell…the book asks a lot of questions and has caused me to think about a lot of things in different ways than I am used to thinking about them…which i very much appreciate…

but i was sure hoping this time that it would cause me to rethink my girly-ness and alleviate some things that make my gut churny and so often leave me feeling powerless…

one of those being my deep longing to be pursued…(in friendships, in relationships, in life…)

i’m a go getter…i often will step in and make things happen…i am not afraid to do it if no one else is doing it…make plans if no one else is making plans…ask someone to be my friend…set up a get together…invite myself along…

if i care enough about it

do you want to know a secret…i love being asked…i long to be invited…i’m excited when someone asks me to be their friend…i don’t know what to do with myself if someone makes the plans…i’m perma-grinny when someone calls out of the blue…

i went to a soul care retreat on saturday (which was fabulous on a variety of levels…) and at this retreat jesus and i had some good “us” time.  one of my take aways was something i couldn’t name until today…which was that in my relationship with God he is inviting me…he is asking me…he is making the plans and he is asking me to be his friend and to share my skills with his other friends…he wants to broaden my horizons and my circle of people and

he’s not waiting for me to make the plans or throw the party or invite myself…

he knows my heart’s longing

and he’s chosen to love me in that way…

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fall loveliness… October 23, 2008

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 11:14 pm

not sure if anyone likes seeing what other people are listening to…but here’s my fall loveliness mix…(if you know these songs…you may see why they cause me to drift into somber-chill mode…but they are oh so fall)

Lucky by Jason Mraz

Only the Sinner by Josh Bales

You are the best thing by Ray LaMontagne

Cologne by Ben Folds

The Lighthouse’s Tale by Nickel Creek

Falling in love at a coffee shop by Landon Pigg

First day of my life by Bright Eyes

Paperweight by Joshua Radin (MY FAVORITE right now)

Details in the fabric by Jason Mraz

Rain by Patty Griffin

Return by Need to Breathe

The world spins madly on by the Weepies

It is absolutely lovely…

 

the cost of yummy… October 22, 2008

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 11:30 pm

So many yummy things in my life have annoying costs…

I love the feeling of shaved legs inside sweatpants but it is annoying to shave my legs when I wear pants all the time.

I love knee socks but don’t really like shoes that you wear with socks..i prefer flops

I love mellow fall music but am not sure that the romantical nature of the lyrics or the somber/chillness these songs invoke in me helps me to be the best me.

I love the potential of new beginnings but am awful at waiting to see what happens.

I love fall colors but am sad when the leaves fall and the color drains to grey.

I love school but don’t always enjoy the “stuff” of school.

so many yummy things in my life right now…but at times they add up to a stomach ache.

 

Note-able… October 13, 2008

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 12:55 pm

Laura came to town last week and the 998 family came together (plus me…a 998 extra) and did Monday night burgers at the nook.

I have been wiped out by a cold that set in on Thursday…so sleeping has been my primary past time for the last 5 days or so…

I promise to return soon.

 

God moments… October 5, 2008

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 10:38 pm

In Jr High Bible class this morning we talked about the people in our lives who are apostles…people who bear witness to the faithfulness and movement of God on Earth. More specifically we talked about the people who remind us often of how God is working in their life and encourage us to see God’s movement in our lives as well.
My list was long…and the people are all incredibly different. But I was challenged when I began to think back through my week this week looking for moments when I was a Truth bringer, a light shining on God’s hand in the midst of life’s chaos.

I read blogs of people who live in Haiti and share their gratitude for God’s provision on a daily basis, I have friends who are more quick to compliment than they are to criticize, and I know my heart’s bend towards discontent and judgment. I suppose this is one of those moments when I should praise because God uses the broken and sinful me even with my cracks and faults.

As I was writing my paper this weekend I found myself overwhelmed at the challenge of explaining how God works in spite of my disorganization and lack of awareness of youth development practices. The paper I was writing was supposed to describe a youth program I am a part of and critically analyze that programs youth development practices by creating a Logic model and assessing it’s effectiveness at reaching it’s outcomes. I chose to describe Foundations (our junior high discipleship process…confirmation…). My professor is not a believer and as I described what we do and what our hoped for outcomes are, I kept using words that make sense to me and maybe to other Christians…but I am not sure they are helpful to a person who doesn’t understand faith…or the work of the Holy Spirit…or the reality that I can plan a lesson and have it bomb but still have a young person touched by the Spirit of God and despite my lack of preparation or planning have a significant faith moment occur.

All this to say…I am grateful that I am taking classes at the U…where God is working with or without my prof’s knowledge. I think this weekend’s paper stretched me more faith wise than many of the papers I wrote at CSP…where we were free to talk Jesus-ease on a regular basis but rarely challenged to explain ourselves or stand up for something. And I am tremendously grateful for a God who uses brokenness and the normal to bring His Kingdom. I hope you see God in powerful ways friends…and thank you for being apostles in my life..

 

So many good things… October 2, 2008

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 3:07 pm

These past few weeks have been filled with so many great memories and firsts…

I took the mega bus to Chicago last weekend. A whopping $47 to travel to and from Bean town is definitely worth the stomachache I had before boarding the double decker beast.  I had very chill seatmates both to and from the city and was blessed to be able to read, sleep and enjoy the travel time.

While in Chicago, Rachel and I went to the Indiana Dunes National Park on Friday (first national park stamp of year 27)…BEAUTIFUL weather and great fall trees to look at on the way. I wouldn’t have changed that day for anything.  THEN that night we went to see Mamma Mia for Rachel’s Birthday!!! STELLAR.  I love theater! We navigated the elevated train with local-ease (not really, but let’s pretend we did) and enjoyed urban people watching.

Now that school is back into swing, the bridge (youth center at church) is open after school daily and I get to hang with kids on Tuesday afternoons.  This past Tuesday there were twin 7th graders sitting across the booth from me at one point.  We were having awesome 7th grade conversations about how much we miss recess and the craziness of passing periods when this conversation took place:

T1: Dude, you look like a mouse.
T2: Whatch you talking about, at least I get dates.
T1: Nuhhhuh…you didn’t just go there…
T2: yeah I did, you only date fat girls
(then looking at me)
T2: no offense, You thick…that’s better than fat…
me: Are you calling me fat?
T2: no, I just told you, thick is better than fat…

Hilarious…I was totally dying on the inside….i love 7th grade boys and all the honesty and lack of awareness they have.

Today, I took a few minutes to head to the park and play. It is a glorious 65 degree day and I can’t think of much that I want to do more than be outside and soak in the beautiful fall.