Life in this moment…

{entertaining, odd, and hopefully not too far away from reality}

inward… February 23, 2009

Filed under: everyday life — Lindsey @ 11:18 pm

I feel like I am on the brink of something…
but that I don’t leave room for the discovery.

I grow consumed by approval and what people think…
even when I have tried very hard to think through something for myself and intentionally not for what others will think. I feel good…then someone adds their wisdom and I feel like an idiot again.

I want to release the burden of explaining myself or feeling like I have to…

I want Jesus’ voice to be the only voice of assurance that I long for and to be satisfied when I hear it…

I want to stop feeling the need to always be improving…

yet…

Stop talking so others can be heard
Stop running and breathe
Stop wasting time in avoidance and show up
Be intentional
Be undivided

these voices keep coming reminding me how flawed and broken I am…all intended to encourage and build up…yet my heart is heavy as they cut through what I thought had been revealed to my heart.

They cause me to doubt what Jesus and I have been talking about…I begin to second guess if I really hear God or just what I want to hear…

I am looking forward to this season…I am thankful for the freedom to admit my failures and flaws and pursue God’s heart…I pray that our methods of surrender and pursuit will be healing to our souls and that we will see ourselves grow more into the likeness of Jesus.

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